Melinda called me today with sad news. We had lost another former student, the fourth this year. Although our grief is nowhere close to that of the loved ones of these girls, we are devastated. And at the core of our grief is the opinion that burying our babies just isn't right. They should be burying us.

Kathy Lynn Rutledge Ruscher was only 48 years old. I do not know the details of her passing except that she died at home and the family has requested memorials be made to the Heart Association. Kathy's obituary appears at the WJBD Web site, so I won't give those details here. Instead, I will share memories.

She was a superb student and a bright young lady who was also athletic. In fact, in my last year of playing on an organized women's softball team, she and two other of my *barely-former* students were teammates. One of the coaches, a good friend of mine named Mike, had a huge crush on her. He had a thing about women in white shorts, and when he saw Kathy in her white shorts, his tongue hit the ground. :) He asked me to fix him up. I did. And later they married and had three children.

Usually I try to avoid weddings ~ I'm just not into ceremonies of any kind. However, since this was probably the one-and-only fix-up that had ever reaped positive results, I attended this wedding. I remember Kathy's desperately needing a safety pin that I happened to have in my purse sewing kit. She commented that she knew if anyone would be prepared, it would be Miss C. :) Their wedding was basically a small, family ceremony, and afterward the newly married couple walked among the guests and greeted everyone warmly and lovingly ~ so much more satisfying than stereotypical receiving lines.

Mikey and Kathy lost their son, Kevin, a few years ago, and not too long afterward, I ran into them at Super Wal-Mart in Mt. Vernon. I will never forget the absolute agony on her face at that time. I have no children, other than furry ones and students, but my mother always said to multiply the grief of a child losing a parent by a billion, and *maybe* you would understand the grief of a parent losing a child.

Perhaps ironically, the last time I saw Kathy was just a few days ago, again at Super Wal-Mart, but here in Salem. She was with her lovely daughter, Kaitlynn, and I was thrilled to see Kathy so happy again. We chatted for many minutes about how busy she was with her family, which now included son Christopher's two boys, Sam and Jacob. Oh my, but she was *SO* proud of her grandsons, though she was somewhat concerned that one of them seemed to prefer his grandpa to his grandma. :)

And now, suddenly, I hear that she is gone. I won't say *forever,* for she left too many special memories behind for a lot of us.

Instead, I will think of her being reunited joyfully with Kevin as they wait patiently for the rest of us to show up.